Reality Check

Assalamualaikum bloggie,

I was in the office half of the day, thinking and trying to look at those papers on my table. Checked them. I wanted to do some readings and material seeking. yet I'm numb.
Then came in an sms ..(out of the blue).. saying, " Allah only test those that He loves.. :-) "

The first thing that strucked my mind was "Astaghfirullahala'zim..aku salah sent lagi ke?" then again, I didn't send any sms today except to Nor apologizing to her coz I didn't pick up her call last night. Eventually, I was right. I did not send any wrong messages..again. I decided to answer "mcm tau2 aje..ada sixth sense ka.." that was me ..STILL trying to be jovial in this turmoil..then I received another answer "kdg2 bila ht tu dh dkt, dia blh rasa :-) tmbh ht mu'min" adeh...right on da dot. inside i was ngomel-ling "tau laa....hang sapaaa....." (in a good thought..)

That sms is right. Hati mu'min ..apatahlagi kan? I was left with tears reading that. So many things popped, I just can't hold it. for a second, I felt my privacy was invaded ( i don't get that "scanning" thing used-to yet ...) It feels awkward when you are in your own world and suddenly knock knock, anybody home? I wasn't expecting anyone.. (heee...didnt mean to be rude, really..)

Back to Allah only tests those whom He Loves...Yes ..i agree. it's just that right now I'm trying to absorb into my head....consoling my heart...not to take it too seriously till it affects my work and concentration...I'm in a process....InshaAllah with Allah's Will, He'll help and show me through...Amin...

to the sms-sender, thank you for reminding..it's kinda nice having your doorbell rang when you are not expecting. though I dislike surprises..I think I can exclude this one. Jazakalllah...

Fading..

Assalamualaikum bloggie..

It's swaying away...slowly and will eventually disappear. Felt like yesterday. (ah..it's always like that.....begin..began...begun....begone...hehehe)

My thursday is a bit slow. I'm tired...from everything.

Not really in the mood to write.

Ciao.

Clamping Heart..

Assalamualaikum bloggie ..

I received (yet) another news. Adoi....heartache....(my mum's char kuey teow punya tahana kot ..) iyyeee la tu ..kan ...Heart? only Heart knows what is it all about...haaa....it was nothing to begin with ...isnt'it Heart? we knew it all along ....stubborn me ..as usual ...I 'happen' to love the game. so...? so... :D sengal lohhh... ( hahahahahaha)

Well....it is a game. no need to sulk lohh...

Tn Hj Rosdi lend me this (look up) book "The Way to Patience and Gratitude - 'Uddat as-Sabirin wa Dhakirat ash-Shakirin" by Ibn Qayyim Al Jawziyya. ( fuh lenguh nak ngeja....heee jgn marah Tuan Hj.)

I guess I'll be spending my weeks reading and extracting that book, along with Hafiz's and Parenting (credit to Tn Hj Rosdi too..) With the assignment coming up and readings - I should be pretty much occupied. Yes! U-GO-LADY!

Passion

I love Red. It's Romantic, Lovely, Gorgeous, Cute, Daring, Brave and Attractive. I got into a minor "altercation" with Amir Alien over the ym chat just now. It's always argument between the 2 of us. If you're wondering who Amir is ..he's a volunteer staff at SA, currently on his break from his studies from AL AZHAR ( saja bagi credit ..since he's so obnoxiously proud of it.. :p)
This Amir guy is soooo grotesque in most conversation I have had with him. Some times it irritates me a lot having to go through conversation with him. Most of his words and the way he answers is mentally annoying ( he better not read this ..else it'll be another topic for us to argue on hahaha)

The worst part is ..HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW (some) of his ways are ANNOYING! I tried telling him, yet he took it wrongly. He flaunted it even more. So how? I asked him which campus of Azhar he's at, and he answered " if I tell you, would you know where the place is? Have you been there? " Urghh...Mind YOU ..I happen to have International Passport (since I was 6!) which has multiple stamps of countries! are we comparing passports now? urgh....MB...The ONLY stamps I would definitely LOOK UP to is IF you have the stamp to HEAVEN! Syurga ALLAH. hanya ITU yang akan buat this gorjes Cik Sha LOOK UP to u. else..be a human and be nice to others. What is wrong with people these days ....who told you to IM me in the first place...I was being nice..( why would I be kind enough to accept his request ...Semuttttttttttttttttt)

Being nice to others suppose to be innate ability. One doesn't have to brag to live. One should know how to mingle with others without making other people feeling bad. That is not good. Even Islam Prohibits it. Susah lohh ..if too pandai ..like det la become...( dah jadi entry about Alien la plak ni heheheheheh) Why did I call him such? coz he's weird the first time I met him and he kinda freaked me. hehe.

Anyhow Alien, all the best to you in your studies and wish u well in becoming an excellent akhi or da'ie or what ever la they call it in your 'world'...

I'm heading to Hypermart for my second mission. Tuna pastry! and probably eyeing for spaghetti, just incase I got bored with rice over Iftar and Sahur.

Adieu..

Lychee Pudding

Assalamualaikum bloggie...

taddaaaa...macam pudding laici gue ..enak banget...hehehehe..emangnyaa....sapa yang bikininnn...(the photo was taken at other site as I didn't have time to snap coz the pudding already finished hahaha, but thats how it looks like ...)

I'm proud to have succeeded in my lychee pudding project.

Now I'm continuing my project on Puding Tauhu, I retrieved the recipe in MyResepi website. There are plenty of wonderful meals there. Try it out, it's worth it.

However, the lychee pudding of mine was a mixture of mesra.net and my own idea. It's wicked delicious! bak kata Wanie, "sedap la auntie sha..sedap sangat sangat.." hohohoho..now THAT is an honest opinion coming from a 5-year old girl. *fly fly fly...*

Boredom..

Assalamualaikum bloggie....

served me right for sulking! hahahaha ....now I am not able to even sleep well because of it. last night I dreamt of calling Nor and woke her up for sahur ..and guess what ..it wasn't a dream! it was true! OMG, i sleep-calling too! haha that's freaky.

I was in my morning classes half of the day and now I'm holding my loo coz I don't dare to go to the toilet at this hour. It's awfully quiet. To my dismay (ok...surprised....) I bumped into an old acquiantance. She was there, jovial as ever and I was there, pissed as ever when the thought of what she did cross my mind. It's a SMALL world ..again. Of all the places, I HAVE to meet her, here? sengal nyaaaa.... Naymind her, waddaheck ...

I stepped into an empty room ( still holding my loo ...) and it's wicked cold in here. I like. Called up mom ..."Nak beli apa petang ni?" and mum " masak sayur air and beli lauk je ..tok soh rajin beli lauk banyok-banyok lah ..takdok sapo nok makey" there she goes, reminding again and again. I don't know what to have for Iftar today. I ran out of what-to-eat list...not that I am too craving during this ramadhan, it's just that, I gotta eat something right, and I haven't the slightest idea on what to indulge. Can i Not eat? that'd be nice for my 'healthy" tummy. Everyday when I look at myself in the mirror while brushing my teeth, my face looks like it's about to explode. I gained weight. Doc Sheikh is gonna kill me for doing so.. I have promised him I should lose some weight and Ramadhan is the best month to practice...( well ...guess what Doc..not happening ..yet...)

thing about me and my weight have been an issue since god knows when. I savor food, that's the problem and when I'm sad. I eat. I am sad. Still Sad. and I eat. haiyoo...

Mr Lim made an example of fattiness juz now ...irkkk...terasa siot ..huhuhu..not his fault. He reminded me of my Malaysian Studies lecturer when I was in Bangi, what was that old man's name..very british-like accent and pompous! hehehe not to mention ...pantang nengok student dahi licin...yang kecut jadi kembang ..hua huah uahuahuah ( kulit dia daaaa....jangan melucah hehehe) My load is piling up and I better use this time to finish it off. I miss my pillow and damnnn.....I can't hold it anymore......

p/s: when u miss someone ..you should tell ...if you tell ? DIE DIE DIE dieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....

Blink Blink

Assalamualaikum ..bloggie..

I just came out from the Academic meeting. I stopped by Students Affair to check out on Semut. She's busy as the mother-bee (hehehe) The Medina group has left for Jeram Mengaji I supposed. SA is always full of men and my Semut. Thing is, Semut is female and going there to say hello or hu-ha with her is a must yet What is slightly 'uncomfortie-bel' is the other three quarter yakni alien, M. Alus and Bapak SA heee :) I used to love hanging around SA to chit chat and hu-ha-eing with Semut. I guess those days are gone ( or probably they got sick and tired over us, hence the replacement of a tougher Bapak SA...to mum Semut and I )

Thing with Semut, she'll never be silent regardless who is around (hahaha too bad....) So I stop there once in a while to gegar the room and I'd leave. hohoho...annoying? oh well ..Reality bites...

I hopped the stairs back up and voila! to my surprise, my bicmate's daughter, the ever-so-talkative Wanie is there. Screaming "Happy Birthday Auntie Sha!!" on top of her lungs, I had to pretend I didn't know her surprise (bic, if you're reading this ..sorry haa....hehehehehe) What a tough thing to do. There I was, "eh!! aawwww...thank you girl......." as usual me and my dunno-what-to-do moment. hahahahaha. Above all, it is really cute.. and there's another surprise, a silver box on my desk. I thought it was Wanie's, however it wasn't. I didn't know who was it from. tang...tang...tanggg.......it remained anonymous..

Gleaming inside, is a crystal bangle..gold colored, brownish... ( ah ..if only I have a camera to snap on..) later la ..I show u haa.... the pokoknya is I LOVE IT.

Dunno who is it from. BUT if you happen to read this entry, thank you very much. I like it a lot. So sweet of you.....if only I could give you a hug.....big huggggg........

Thank you ....thank you all for your kind thoughts...I cherish it ..May Allah bless ya'll with many more wonderful moments to come...Amin..

Says who I can't celebrate life? See... Allah is The Greatest of All.....Absolutely!

Happy Birthday

Assalamualaikum bloggie..

Happy Birthday! it's virgonian moment! a three one moment ...what was it like ? huh ...nothing....i should be a year wiser... SHOULD... (hahahahaha)

May you find WHO and WHAT you're looking for .. Amin..

Endearment..

Assalamualaikum bloggie..

I feel slightly mellow today. I shouldn't have fallen asleep after Subuh, else this is the impact. I got tired. I do not feel like talking to people today as I am lethargic. Looking things and people around me making me dizzy and wanna puke (seriously!)

I lost my appetite (ironically..) Ustaz Mahamad (my favorite ustaz here) left for Umrah today. I was almost in tears knowing he's leaving. He is a kind father-figure to me. He came upstairs JUST to see me and wish goodbye, softened my heart..( ahh...am always the melodramatic one...) May Ustaz and his family have a blissful 'umrah..Amin..

Me? I'm still here. Contented and lethargic.. People? Don't feel like it..they have always been okay ....Why do I bother? exactly...

Ramadhan : Day Two

Assalamualaikum ..bloggie..

Ramadhan Mubarak! Day 2 is quite exhausted for me and Shikin because both of us are the avid fan of toilet this morning. She took a day off..and Me? i Had to be in the office. I have presentations and papers to supervise. whoaaaa....However, knowing that my Lychee Pudding is waiting for me for Iftar...soothes all... he he he he .... it's an accomplishment indeed.

I'm contented..for some reasons.