Sunday, August 31, 2008

From Afar

Assalamualaikum wbt ..

It is a relief, indeed. To finally get the answer for a question that has been pondering my mind coupla months back. it's positive. Alhamdulillah..that is His Blessing for His devoted servant.

Me? I'm glad. I do not have to look for 'that' tunnel (hehehe..) I am not even surprised at all to hear (or should I say read the news hoho..Alhamdulillah...)

The gradual calmness You're Giving me is seeping in..Dear God...THANK YOU.

What next ? China? or Bali? I think it's time for me to "go" out. Or ..may be Australia? I haven't seen my aunt for so long. Abg Mad and family from loqstaq came for a visit during the Merdeka weekend. It has been a long time since I "left" Kedah. After Abah's demise, there was no reasons for me to return. There was no one. That's how I felt. When I saw them last night, I still have family over there... I still do.

May be for a start, this year's annual trip would be going back to Kedah. How about that..I have been missing my childhood anyway.. maybe that could be a good start ...

Having few good friends around is soothing. Alhamdulillah ..Allah Shares that with me. Syukur Alhamdulillah..

Ramadhan is approaching, and I just can't wait ..
Have a wonderful Ramadhan people...Love and Embrace...

Saturday, August 30, 2008

A Place Fondly at Heart...

I won't mind waking up to this everyday. Pure, sincere, honest, love and time.
Life is a layer of seasons. It comes and goes. Surely, it will return. Convincingly, it will part. A cycle of hope and fond memories which are quite unseparable to us human.
I learned mine, the hardest I have ever felt. Still, I'm surprised with many new levels and interesting tests. At times, I got confused, scared, lonely, fulfilled and diversified.
Everyday, I discover new values. Right before my eyes, of which I never thought it'll be. I thank Allah SWT for giving me this chance- to Live. An ustaz was saying, how lucky humans are, to be able to embrace another Ramadhan. What if we didn't wake up tomorrow? What if we didn't get to reach another Ramadhan? What if this is my last time blogging? What if ..this is my last time uttering thoughts and mind on this screen? What is my life unto?
Suddenly, it started to make sense. Life's the best teacher whilst experience provides undeniably amazing judiciary council. One moves forward. One fights. One evolves. One stands till it Ends, no matter what it takes. Faith is in the blood. Not just the mind nor actions. Faith is in the Heart and Allah SWT is always there to Bestow His Blessings on us. To Keep on Looking onto us, ensuring our path is not being misled. and may He keeps on wanting to Look at mine as I'll be Damned if He ever Changes His Glance. Nauzubillah..
Living in this path I have adamantly chosen, is incredibly astounding. I fight for what I Believe. I stand for who I am. you bet I will. Whoever you have become and whomever you are with, will not weaken me. Neither will it weeps nor destruct my Faith that I have been embracing. It will be my Personal Mission to further discover myself, my faith and my posterity. Thus the pandora's Box of yours are no longer enticing to me.
There is always a fullstop for everything, I mean ...E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G

Love of My Life

I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.

Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of a bay:
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.

The waves beside them danced, but they
Out-did the sparkling leaves in glee;
A poet could not be but gay,
In such a jocund company!
I gazed—and gazed—but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:

For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the daffodils.

(William Wordsworth)


Assalamualaikum ..bloggie..
imagine the sound ...and THAT is how I am at the moment. bombed, crashed..and all myriads of negativity inside.. hmm...I'm simply V.U.L.N.E.R.A.B.L.E

I hung out with Pet last nite at KBmall. Earlier on I had threw up and decided to cancel our dinner. I washed my lisa and keep on scrubbing till i almost scratched her skin..hehe..poor thing. Poor me. As I was trying to "scratch" the past from my memory. I had planned the dinner few weeks back, and it wasn't easy trying to catch up with our schedules. Thanks to the "problem" my.. MY dinner had to be cancelled. my chum chum dinner...

SO many things are on my mind. no matter how many gazillion times i won't go away. hmmm..apart from Pet, Nor is also back in town for merdeka weekend, I didnt get the chance to meet up. We normally love the beach and afternoon ayaq nyioq at PCB. May be I should try that this afternoon...

what Pet said ..made sense..however, I am still sighing.....haaaaaa............

Wednesday, August 27, 2008


Assalamualaikum bloggie ...
What a tiring day. Sometimes I this the right choice? :) Not that I'm regretting just came across my mind it really how this world is?

I am not expecting miracles in this line of work. But I do hope and pray Allah SWT is always by myside. I came out from today's Liqa with plethora of thoughts in my head. One of it is...My relationship with Allah SWT, The Creator, The Almighty, The Everything. HE gave me Bunny when I needed Love most. He took him back when it's time. Then, I complained. Now, I realized...Now..I truly understand...NOW ...I believe...even more..


Monday, August 25, 2008


Even animals Love each other...and us human...?

Wednesday, August 20, 2008


I am really tired from my "injured" throat. Now am packed with project supervising. and it is ...reaaaaaaaaaaaaaally...time consuming and thought-provoking.

My time management skill is being tested when I'm still stucked with that report. yes ..for you out there who knew what was the report about ...YES I am STILL not done with that report... I have 2 reports to finish BY THE WAY ...and as usual and me and me and me AND...ME.

Tomorrow will be off for the must-go PnP workshop. In Pantai Cahaya Bulan..Perdana Resort..hmmm..beach..course..beach..course..COCONUT!!! kakanoot Aki usually says it ...

Back to teaching-licious moment! yarrrshhh!

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

The Creator and I

"Ya Allah, perbaikilah agamaku, agar ia menjadi penopang dan tumpuan seluruh urusanku. Perbaikilah duniaku, agar ia menjadi tempat hidup yang baik bagiku. Dan perbaikilah akhiratku, agar ia menjadi tempat kembali yang membawa kebaikan bagiku. Jadikanlah hidup ini sebagai media untuk menambah amal baik dan jadikanlah kematian untuk memutuskan ku daripada amal buruk.."
"Wahai Zat yang Maha Kuasa untuk mengubah hati manusia, Tetapkanlah hatiku dalam agama-mu..."
"tidak ada Tuhan Selain Allah, Yang Maha Bijaksana dan Pemurah. Maha Suci Allah yang menguasai Arasy dan segala puji bagi-Nya, Tuhan Sekalian Alam.."
"Wahai Zat yang Maha Hidup dan tidak pernah lalai, hanya Rahmat-Mu yang ku harapkan dapat membantuku..."
Amin YaRabbal a'lameen...

"Debu Umpama Bedak di Syurga"

Amazing, isn't it?

I was staying late in the office, relaxing, catching up on my lecture notes and preparation. As I was rolling around in my chair, a book I borrowed from Hafiz caught my glance. O yeah, I haven't finished reading that....So I decided to flip the following pages and read for a while before I clean up my desk and head home. Here's what fascinate me...

"Ath-Tabrani meriwayatkan daripada Rabi' bin Zaid, beliau berkata: Ketika Rasulullah SAW berjalan dengan santai dan tenang, tiba-tiba ia melihat seorang pemuda daripada suku Quraisy berjalan menyendiri, baginda SAW bertanya:"bukankah dia itu si Fulan?" Para Sahabat menjawab: "Ya." Nabi SAW berkata: "Panggillah ia." Maka pemuda itu pun datang. Nabi SAW bertanya kepadanya: "Kenapa engkau berjalan menyendiri?" Ia menjawab: "Aku tidak suka kena debu." Nabi SAW bersabda: "Janganlah engkau menjauhinya." Demi yang diriku dalam genggamannya, sesungguhnya ia (debu) adalah BEDAK di syurga (kelak)."
Al Haitami berkata (Jilid 5, hal.287): Hadith ini diriwayatkan oleh Tirmizi, dan Rijal-rijalnya adalah Tthiqah.
One word - WOW. and more wow..It came to my mind when I drove behind a truck or lorry that was sooooooooo black with dust and carbon monoxide. :D
Frankly, I can never picturize Heaven, but ...all the stories and hadiths I have been reading are ... Mind boggling, I'd say. It's too beautiful to even visualizing it. Being a bedak in Heaven is like having the best Dior two-way cake powder! even MORE! Only Allah knows..
I better find my way "there".....shape up ..or ship out ...

What a week..

Huh... It's an exhausting week.

So many things occured and am flat. not dead...but FLAT.

Despite all the things going upside down in my life, I had to move forward. It's agonizing. At one time, I felt like stopping the time and locked myself in a capsule.


Continue later.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Dreamlight Obsession *winks*

Yay! I managed to play around with this new software. Not that I don't have anything to do, I'm exhausted. so Dear Wonderful readers of mine (do i have any?) Nice to "meet" you here, thank you for stopping by.
I was forced to bite a bullet today. Hence the boredom of browsing and floating around The Web.
Feelin' blue...( huhu )

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Post: The 3rd International Muslim Business Network Forum

Finally. The forum ended at 1.00pm earlier. One word- eye opener (isn't it a phrase?...hee) It was an informative session for me (plus with a plan of rearing chicken on my mother's land) Little did I expect it will be quite interesting for a person like me. Not that I exclude the business world, I do wish I can be as genius as those entrepreneurs (still having hard time to spell this!) out there who make money in a blink. I had this crazy thought, before going that I'll most probably see "the usuals". Well, I guess I was partially right. It's crowded with males. Aged, married, rich men (excuse me I wasn't hunting men over there). Enough about them, what interest me was the females are a mixture of all (how nice..) It was a pleasant ambience. I (DID) feel comfortable and somehow ..(fitting in?) at ease.
There were entrepreneurs and businesspersons from Sri Lanka, Phillipines, China, Indonesia to name a few. I was there with Khairi, Hassan and Atikah. Awsome people with awsome hearts.
Will return with photos later on. Now I gotta proceed on my delayed works :)

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Pre: The 3rd International Muslim Business Network Forum, 9-10th August

Why me? Exactly, that was the phrase popped out of my head upon hearing my name being mentioned to attend "that". I wasn't freaking out, but more on the flabbergasted version 'cause for me to even be shortlisted is like..NEVER..( da'ahh..)

Although, it's an honor ( though I have no clue on what will I be seeing or should I say WHO will I be meeting..) Once in a while I chuckled when I thought of it. Goodness Gracious ..ME? ( I know! I still can't believe it.... deal with it haha) Again, I'd daresay It's an absolute honor to be able to meet new groups of people (or Free Food as Fadhli was rephrasing it for cruel...) Ok, before I keep yapping let's checkout the primary objectives of THE event..

  • to gather and unite all Muslim entrepreneurs in various industries and expertise ( this is where I don't mostly fit in *lol*) to generate a rocklike (huh?) ummah's economy.
  • to create an international information network for Muslim entrepreneurs ( I always dislike spelling this word...OMG...)
  • to serve as platform for Islamic business transaction ( this is me....yeah...hush..hush..)

Frankly speaking, where entrepreneurs are concern, I'm nowhere near the field. I suxx at business-like ..stuffs (see..didn't I tell u...) IT is my brother's and sister's field. I can picture myself having the hardest time ever to digest all the information and "exchanging thoughts" session, let's just hope I didn't make a fool out of myself...(or others...he he he..)

This more or less similar to what I attended in New England back then on the honor of Dr Khattak's invitation. It was a wonderful event. Surrounded by extensive Muslims from all parts of the world. I mean that was really awsome..(and the Baklava gotta eat, right?)

Let's just pray I don't screw up. Thing about me doing the write up for K.E is that, I knew how particular he is (meticulous? heee ...I call it professionalism). Working for K.E in some matters freak me. To hear him suggesting MY name ..was concurrently exhilarating and shocking! I have this so called K.E-phobic thingy... not that I did things that contradict him, it's just the expectation and the must-push-to-all-limits, the u-can-do-it Sha! (yeah baby!) *grins*

Anyhow, we'll see how it goes, if you're lucky, there will be some images.. (IF..)


Monday, August 4, 2008

My Baby Lala

Lala passed on last night. I went home from work, finding him laying and whining upon hearing me calling his name. I knew somehow yesterday when he glanced at me that was the last. I patted him to "sleep" and he refused to see me cry. He moved under the bed and "rested" there. I cried ( as usual..) I bond too much with animals than human. (yes...Lala is my beloved tabby...) My mom and I are attached to him like our baby. He's our smiles and my friend at home. He loves to tease my mom by walking backward everytime she wants to put him outside. He wasn't scared of the rain. He loves his uncle tum-tum dearly and jumps on his head everytime they play together. He likes to snuff on awouk's ball whenever awouk is enjoying his meals and pisses that guy off... that's my cheeky Lala. I'll miss him..

I stopped taking photos of my cats long time ago. Keeping pictorial memories hurt (to me) I know some would find me freaky for bonding with animals, though I find it very peaceful and comforting to be surrounded by animals. This entry is a tribute to my endless loves of my "companions" previous, current and future....