Serenity

salam bloggie

and Allah again Gives His Blessing. I Found out the Reason Why. It was conveyed to me in a unique way....subtle but Clear.

and to His Submission, I adhere. I now Know Why. I got The Answer from Him. Shukran.

it was not even a memory to begin with. it was a lesson to Grow me and educate me of Life.
Of how Human can be manipulating and Ignorant. That human would do anything (and by that I mean ANYTHING to get what they want and hid behind Religion to stay "humble" and "innocent".

Now that I know what it was ALL about ...again I am fooled by Lust but Taught by Allah to See Life in different perspectives, to which am Indeed Grateful.

The Ending may not be good but It's Consoling to know that It wasn't Me.

:)
Alhamdulillah.

Will it Kill you to say Please?

chak! aa salam bloggie ..

tonight i came upon another truth...that Hurts so Deep...till I do not know how to Forgive...oh But I will Forgive for I want to Move on...

Dear Allah ...please take this news away ...from me.
I beg You for your Mercy.

:(

Ifthar alone.

salam bloggie!

bored. i got to buka puasa alone. rasa mcm zaman dulu2 ..masa duk kat vermont.. nguahahahaha cewahhh...koya~

but it is quiet ...iftharing alone. haa tu la ....padan muko aku...

:) he he ...nasib ler belalang...

Smile to Your Heart

hehe chak! again..hi bloggie ..salam!

today i had the biggest laugh of my life. i didnt know what happened in our life, but the eagerbeaver team did some crazy stuffs today. it was too hilarious till i cant focus on my driving. gosh ..what were we thinking? pulling that kind of stunt? I bet Dato' is gonna grill us big time hahahaha...crazy mother! ha ha ..

the name eager beaver...suits us ...damn much! everyone was lookin hi and low for the 3 stooges. lol and kak lan was gone with the wind. undetected. i wonder where did she hide...hahahah..adoii...gila betui la korang....

and here i am now ..sitting and reminiscing...to the green gable years....oh mr blythe is JUST the right man to every girl's heart...ha ha ....it hit worldwide. little did I know it was a blast back then...gosh ...it was like ..before puberty. haha

i feel much much better today despite the stunt we pulled....good riddance ...i was ( still am) their leader...zorro tak bertauliah! LOL. apa aku nak jawab next week wei! we are so toasted!

i wonder what's in the store tomorrow ...i need to resume my laundry ..as usual ..jadi mak-mak ...mcm lynn senget kata...tu la keja aku ...if tak mengkadambabu kat ofis ..jadi kaldai kat umah plak ...he he...comei je..kaldai bulat..hahaha...

oh well...selamat teruskan ibadah puasa ...and let's sleep puas2 esok! hoyeahhhhhhhhh! pas tu petang masuk opis buat keje... huhu...

now? nak layan mata mr blythe chumei. hahahaha

Best Thing I Never Had

cak! hi bloggie! salam!

huhu...i am so energetic despite the fact i am in the most challenging Week EVER! sometimes I wonder when Will this crazy life of mine stop? seriously...It didnt pay me much ..BUT I really feel Good doing These... :)

and I still cant stop smiling hahaha..i dont even know why ...I had a not-so-good day yesterday ...BUT...i didnt care much ..done is Done. Move On. Right love?

and for i donno how long ....i havent had ifthar with my nieces ...and yesterday Allah Granted me that wish. We buka puasa together. Like a Family we're Used to be. They Grew up when I was not here. I did not get a chance to be part of their Lives. Now that I am here, I would Definitely wanna make up for the time I've Lost..or suffice to say, Times I've Missed :)

Oh dear It felt so Great, sharmin cooked like super a lot ...unfortunately they were mostly freakin large shrimps and more shrimps! haha ...shrimps to me are like Kryptonite to Superman hahahah ...what a way to analogously put it huh? but It is ...I can't have too much prawn in me meals...it kills me ..inside out. so I only took ONE tiny lil one (that was the only one ..since the rests were XL tiger prons hahaha giler weii..) luckily there was chicken korma and veges..I love bokchoy! hoyeah! and grilled catfish ...shafira told me to buy at the stadium. The foods were scrumptious and Heaven~ most importantly ...Time with Family is Priceless. Although I can never buy back the Time I have Missed watching them Growing up, But I am Thankful, I still get to see them Now. Thank You Allah.

and believe me Allah ..I am still Smiling. hahah tak sedar diri esok another killin day ...haha what to do ..this is My Life. One step Further I shall Wait. in the Meantime ...burn the oil...kiss the stars ...smooching the wonderful nite skies ...and the Moon is just ..Perfect; to me :)

I'm Thankful - Alhamdulillah.

pssstt..... Miss me? *winks*

yeppi day!

hi bloggie ..salam

it's just around the corner.
i couldnt wait much longer. this year i pray for it to be different..
i pray for it to be quiet...and Worthwhile..
i pray for it to be private and meaningful.

I hope my prayers are Granted. Ameen...

The World

hi bloggie ...salam

i got meself addicted to indo pek now ...dang..hehehe ...thanks to bolynn buntats ku ...that was just it. i guess it filled me days ...after long hours at work.... hee...*oh yeah?* haha

i was lounging like a rotten potato earlier and my mind was brought back to monday's lecture ...
I recalled talking to the class about life and death. it was like a short 5 minutes ads ...as I would always say ..heh hehehe..thing is ..I always LOVE sharing with them the story of life...story of the World ...story of us ...the human in it....

it all started when I was talking about all the chronic diseases today ....and was relating it to Death....one after another ...the topic lead to ...of how I fear ...what would happen to me ...if I were to be diagnosed with one ..( or two ..or few) and I have no one to look after me...I wouldn't know what to do .....I wouldn't know how to be Strong ....I wouldn't know how to Deal with it ....I expressed my Fear to them .....Not even a second late...a student abruptly spoke up..."TAK PE MISS! KAMI JAGA MISS! - followed by a few other students in unison .."YA!" : Dear Allah ...I was Speechless. I almost cried...but I didn't. I composed myself and smile and change topic. I could not Face them in that manner. I was too Speechless, Shocked, Amazed, Surprised...and Sad. in that Fleeting Moment, I Thank ALLAH SWT...for giving me Them in My World. Sungguh Allah...Aku Kagum. Terima Kasih.

Tidak Sia-Sia didikan yang Engkau Berikan kepada Mereka...I am Forever Touched by Your Grace...SubhanaALLAH.

and today in another class, I was talking on sabbatical, after my two team members come back from theirs, in a year and a half's time; whole class was half screaming ..WHAT?! NO.....and another student was saying ..."eh AFTER we graduate la .."

The faces that I saw today ( and previous), Made IT just Hard~

contemplating

salam bloggie .
of all the many things i wanna do tomorrow ...i am thinking to delete this blog...and all sorts of chat medium application on my lappy...

this is really gonna be a big move for me ...It is time for me to focus on my work. I feel a lot better these days and I am ready ...to leave the cyber world. I have other better things to do in life....
friends can keep in touch via phone ...emails ..smses....

there is no need for me to be connected to yahoo or blog anymore ...i have successfully left fb for good. why not these..?

precisely.

i am making a decision soon. and I am confident I will walk through This.

Grateful!

Alhamdulillah....

hi bloggie ..salam!

I have all the rights in the world to sujud syukur like khaerul azzam ketika cinta bertasbih heheheheh...Dear Allah ...Terima Kasih Banyak~

ALHAMDULILLAH.

IttaQullah~

hi bloggie...salam ..

haigh ..i have been swamped with sooooooooooooo many chores. and today's tadarus was fun. hee...and the afternoon heat with izzati was helluva terrible heaty day...i think i got heatwave strikes...inside my body....ini siyes~~~~

citer nye I have to go and take up the order for 20 chicken pies...at my sis's house in kb. dang....tiba2 the road seemed so jauh and horrible....but..I had to ....there I was ...steamin' hot and lemao la after that...

i went to my class feeling soooo THIN and MELTED. I ran to the ladies and wet my face and legs..he he siyesly...dehydrated and am CURRENTLY having teh o suam .....non stop ..hahahahha

waddaya know ....the business my niece is doing is picking up its pace. it seems like i am the only who's having uber faith in them.

IF only sharmin wanna do it for a longer period of time .. i wouldnt mind to support it ..coz her pie is good and her knowledge from Mandarin Oriental shouldnt be put to waste. I am a keen supporter of pastries anyways...I can imagine myself opening a pastry cafe ...if not being a teacher....or kuli batak like dis ...ho ho ho...mcm best kan ? hee...*poof!* verangan tak hengats....

again..in this dinasor kingdom...who would wanna savor good brewed coffee and tea with pastries? e.x.a.c.t.l.y~

takkan nak cari customer high end saja kot......that's absurd.

haigh...

First Ifthar!

hi bloggie...Salam..

first day of Ifthar for this ramadhan...haigh ...gile hectic! kelantan is jampacked. mai mana la semua manusia tiba2 bawak kluaq keta masing2 duk letak ataih jalan raya ....nyet nyet....aku nak balik keja pun jadi jam ...APA KES?! ompteh kata ...waddahell? hahaha serious....what's with orang kita ...the celcom line is crazy since last night....all sent messages were not delivered...system down ...saks ...and tiba2 late at night ..i received sms-es ( yeah like so freakin PLURALS!) so bykk ..wishing this and that ....people out of nowhere....whom I rarely heard from ...long lost schoolmate suddenly got my number from ahmad albab mana tah ...texted me ..."Selamat berpuasa" urgh...come on.....serious aku rasa nak carut ... awat ? kene tunggu posa dulu ka baghu nak contact kawan? of berpuluh tahun lama nya? nak kene tunggu ramadhan dulu ka ..tetiba ang teringat kat former cikgu hang ni? and nak wish?! lame-O....this is Orang Kita ....wahai Melayu2 Sekalian...( aku PUN melayu jugak...kekdahnya~~)

i wonder what happened to 335 days of their lives? Do they EVEN remember? I bet most of those sms-es are forwarded....they didnt even bother staying up all night to ensure the sentence RHYMED! sheesh~ puaka nya aku ...astaghfirullah....

then again ...that's how orang2 Bangsa Ku ..."menghargai" orang2 di sekeliling mereka....if it's not because of Puasa...or Eid ...or CNY or Deepavali....haram la orang2 nak ingat and wish for other's prosperity everyday....kan? klu ada pun berapa kerat la sangat.....put up yr leg and count-lah.......To Those who Really Appreciate your Friends and Loved Ones plus Family ..365 days ...I Salute You! KUDOS!

what did i do today? buat groceries utk stock sampai raya...coz I am sooooooooooooooo not gonna drive after 5pm in this month. people mistaken puasa for fun fair kot....practically every human in kelantan comes out from nowhere....I'd rather stay in the house. watch that idiot box...and do nothing. plus I think my mense is near ...he he he it's no good to be near human anyways ...

i'm still in shock and denials of Crowds~ *heh*